Just say no...

I know this might be kind of a "duh" moment for some of you, but I was thinking about it so you get to hear it.

I have spent a lot of time in the alternative sub-cultures. There are a lot of socially awkward, (And possibly mentally disturbed), young kids who get into magic and traipse around doing crappy card tricks they learned off ellusionist, or more likely youtube nowadays, and calling themselves a magician.

So far, nothing out of the ordinary. However, I feel it is my job, nay DUTY to inform some fo you out there that you cannot be a drug addict and do magic. If you are high on meth and trying to do "Street magic" for tips, you will FAIL. Just because you can hide it from your parents doesn't mean that the rest of the world can't tell yer high as a kite.

An 18 year old strung out teenage will NEVER have a promising career as an entertainer. It's that simple. So lay off the drugs, or lay off the magic. Actually, just stick to the drugs...

it's cheaper.

Bizzaro.

bigger = better?

If you have or have ever thought of having a manipulation act, and decide the best way to end your act is to produce a GIANT version of something that makes NO sense... don't.

If it is a prop that doesn't exist in real life, it might be hard for the audience to come along with you in the believability department. Sure I used to produce giant eyeballs in an act at one time. I realize the irony of this post. However, something that abstract can work. Giant pipes or cell phones... not so much. Doing a CD act and then giant CD's is about where the line ends. After that it gets silly.

There are better ways to end any manip act. Sometimes with an emotional hook or maybe bring an everything back around full circle. However, as magicians we do tend to fall back on what we see. We only know what we see. We only know what we read. We really need to know more.

So in conclusion, I would just like to say: If you think ending your magic routine producing giant cock rings is a good idea...

think again.

Bizzaro.

A big deal....

Last night I was speaking with some folks at the local Wednesday night gathering and someone turned to our buddy, Scott Hitchcock and told him, with no amount of ego stroking, that he did the best Fizz Master presentation they had seen.

For those who might not know what Fizz Master is (like this young man) it is the transferring of agitated carbonation from one soda can to another. Scott does make quite a production out of it and it's great because of that fact.

I bring this up tonight because we went and saw the new show Freaks, which is a fun romp and if you like midgets and faux clown sex, this show is a MUST see. Most of the things presented are done very theatrically and silent. This not only makes the performers stand out but the effects as well. All are little vignettes that center around one stunt or another.

A lot of times magicians try to stuff as much as they can into one routine. I have been guilty of this in the past and learned to trim things down here and there where it might be necessary. By making a big production out of something simple, you can create an enjoyable theatrical experience for everyone.

Sometimes, a few tiny effects centralized around a certain theme can work well too. However, you have to be careful and not go too far out there so as people can follow you back from the trip you take them on. Otherwise, you end up with everyone getting lost.

Then you end up with a show called Believe.

Bizzaro.

That outta learn yah...

I have been chatting with a very exuberant young lady on a magic message board who says she has been kinda turned off looking for advice on many of the boards because it's full of "little boys and their toys" (more or less). I for one am all for someone, male or female, looking to better themselves artistically. However, in today's world there is a slight problem with that. The Internet.

The problem with the internet is it is NOT a place to learn from. Period. You cannot learn how to perform in front of a live crowd. You can't develop the best patter in social situations, and you SURE as fuck can't learn how to spell, nor use punctuation properly. (even tho' Firefox has this keen little function called a SPELL CHECKER BUILT RIGHT IN!!)

However, if you want to post unpolished material and shots of your crotch, or have your performances lambasted by armchair 12 year olds with mad l33t skills, then the internet is the perfect place for you to be. If this sounds like a good idea to you, please stop reading my journal and beat yourself unconscious with the keyboard or laptop you happen to have in front of you. This way, there will be one less asshat to deal with online and we can get down to a little online Darwinian pruning of the species.

Evolve.

Bizzaro.

Back from Atlantic City. Not in the mood to write anything... expect this.


Bizzaro.

Just a quick note to everyone that this week (5th-11th) I will be out in Atlantic City at Trick Zone in the Tropicana Casino performing.

I might even be doing a lecture. They are a lot like reading this journal... but with sound FX.

Bizzaro.