Tuesday, November 27, 2007

This song goes out to all places green and silly...

(Click to see it bigger ooh baby)


Saturday, November 24, 2007

This just disgusts me...

I was looking on indeed.com for shits and grins (What does that mean exactly?) and came across an ad for THIS:

We are looking to train a few select people to work full time as children's magicians, interactive dj's for both weddings, corporate events, and kids parties, balloon artists, facepainters, and airbrush artists.
You must have experience working with children between ages 2-10.
Be a quick learner, and highly artistic.
Be outgoing, high energy, have the ability to interact with kids.
Must be clean cut, attractive, and personable.
Know how to handle any situation with professionalism.

These people are going to TRAIN some off the street dumbass to perform magic. Just like those tourist trap magic stores. No experience necessary. Either two years in magic OR two years in sales. They think in a week they can make you a passable magician.

This crap is EXACTLY the reason why magic books are in the games and hobbies section of book stores. THIS is why magic has no respect anymore. THIS is why so many re-re's run rampant in the magic world and why the magic cafe has such a high member count. Let's look at this list of requirements shall we?

Quick learner? Clean Cut? Attractive!? PROFESSIONALISM!!? They're talking about MAGICIANS for fuck's sake!! Go to any, and I repeat... ANY of the magic boards online and you will see NONE of this by and large. Those who have these traits are already working and making real money.. the rest of you are giving the rest of us a bad name.

Yes yes I know there are other things in that list, but I am focusing on magician cuz' it's THERE. Lumped in with face-painters and balloon sculptors. (Which is insulting to those people as well I am sure... but screw them. I'm not one of them. They can get their own journal.)

Ok sure I am being a bit over the top here, (Not the arm wrestling kind either), but this is pretty ridiculous, wouldn't you agree? You know what I want for x-mas this year?

Less asshattery in magic.

Know what I am gonna get for x-mas?



* Not actual dick....

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

It takes 300 pictures to get one usuable one...

Or in this case who knows HOW many posts on a message board to get one with some thought behind it. This is cross posted from another forum where an essay calling out the importance of signing cards and ending clean in magical effects and my response.


Over the summer I performed magic as a pirate for the local six flags. I could not have the cards signed as markers and pens would have been EXTREMELY out of character. I still did the same magic I normally do (Card on floor, dollar transpo, etc) without the usual signatures. They got the same responses as normal.

People don't think in the same lines we do. They trust us (And those who don't have a reason not to). If your conviction is strong enuff, seldom will they question you. I have been doing card to wallet for I dunno how long now (Unsigned version). Showing it no longer in the deck and then in the wallet is enuff proof for them. I have a signed version I can do as well if necessary, but it hasn't presented itself thus far.

Michael Close had an essay in his workers series about how people don't take into account the amount of prep we as magicians are willing to put into something. They don't think we'd have three outs to a trick in our wallets (Thank you David Regal), they don't even KNOW double backed cards exist, and if you have a confederate with a duplicate card somewhere ready to go, well then forget about it.

I will admit, there are some effects I would NEVER do without a signature... however it adds to the performance. It's not just there for the sake of it's own magnificence.

People believe us because we tell them to. This is why magic works the way it does and also why people like the Asshat and Criss Fishing Rod are on TV still.

On ending clean, I have learned that, sometimes, it's just not necessary. We have a habit of trying to get our hands empty ASAP if we hold out at the end. A good example of this is Perkins' In Your Face Change. I have been doing it for people and it has such a STRONG slap in the face impact, that they can't reconstruct backwards cuz' their brain shut down on them. If your magic can be that strong (Not confusing. "Confusion isn't magic" - Dai Vernon) then you can hold out as long as you want and clean up later down the road.

It's all relative... so ask yer relatives this Holiday season.


Monday, November 19, 2007

Someone once railed me in a review for an effect I used to sell on my website (MY WEBSITE. Not in the mass market) that it would be better suited in lecture notes and not as a stand alone trick. I understood that sentiment BUT the same could be said for 90% of magic that is produced nowadays.

With desktop publishing and file sharing ANYONE can have a slick looking product with minimal effort. It scares me to think what the future holds.

Speaking of the future, we are coming up soon upon an anniversary soon. I'll give you a hint. It's in December, involves green, and a lot of people don't like it. If you said Christmas or the birth of jeebus YER WRONG!!!!!

This journal was started 4 years ago this Dec. 11th. What does that mean to you? Not a damn thing to the like.. FIVE of you who read this. What does it mean to me? I have been rambling about the same shit for 4 years. Eventually I am gonna run out of things to complain about and start repeating myself. We don't want THAT now do we? I didn't think so.

So with that in mind, at some point this place will close up shop. Not anytime soon I am sure. Regardless, after a while, something like this is like masturbating with a cheese grater: Amusing at first, but ultimately painful... not just for you but for others around you.

But hey, that doesn't mean we can't have some fun!! In the four years of doing this, I have random contests and stuff and this year is no different. On Dec. 11th there will be a contest for the MUTHERLODE!! It'll be easy too. Minimal effort on your part. (Which from what I have seen is what you people seem to like)

Keep looking to the skies...


"Criss use to be such a pretty girl"

At first I was like naaaah.. and then I was like.. yaaaaah.

What the hell happened? From 80's hair metal to.. um.. emo I guess... not sure what the hell he's doing now. I can see it all clearly. In the 80's he blew his mind out with drugs and groupies (Like everyone else with that kind of taste in clothes and music) and now he a bitter jaded old rocker. (For those who don't know he is over 40)

This explains soooooooo much.


Saturday, November 17, 2007

A forum of NON magicians who dislike Criss Fishing Rod.



Clothes make the....

I was on the phone earlier this evening with Brett Loudermilk (yes that is his real name) and we briefly came upon the discussion of clothing... mainly brought upon by his suit...

It was given to him by Todd Robbins. (To which I jokingly said, "And I thought he LIKED you.")

Regardless, I have touched on the idea of costuming on here before. (And if you remember that far back, yer a better person than I) We discussed how Robert Houdin decided to go against the norm of dressing like chinese guys and wizards and wear the typical fare of the times... which was formal wear. Tails, coat, dickie, etc. He went against the grain to stand out. Here it is, who knows how many years later, and magicians are STILL dressing like that.

Then came The Asshat who realized that most magic was populated by so many fashion victims and decided to stand out (Or maybe he just LIKES to shop at good will. Whatever.) In magic, the phrase - "Imitation is the sincerest form of yada yada" has a firm stranglehold in the minds and hearts of so many. It works for them and they appear to be cool cuz' they are on TV. If I dress like them, maybe I can get lucky. (Of course by lucky, they mean not beat up in school. Getting girls for a magician goes beyond luck and right into the realm of MIRACLES.)

Remember, we are performers. We are given the public leeway to be eccentric. That means the way we act AND dress. So feel free to stand out a bit and wear something that gets you noticed. It's part of our jobs to be a bit different.Just stay away from clown costumes.

They have a bad enuff rap as it is.


Monday, November 05, 2007


This weekend was the sideshow gathering. A GREAT time had by all. While I was there a performer by the name of Dr. Wilson performed the cups and balls. Now I am not a huge fan of this effect. Seen it done one too many times the same way. I personally cannot STAND to see the version where someone puts the ball in their "pocket" and then it "jumps back". No one EVER shows their pockets empty afterwards.

For one, Dr. Wilson did not do this. Score one point. Secondly he did something that makes PERFECT sense as a performer. He commanded the balls to perform. When causing the ball to go from the middle of the stack to the bottom, he would point his wand (Magic kind. Get yer mind out of the gutter.. it's in my way) at the cups and exclaim, "Penetrate!" To collect them under one cup he uttered the command, "Assemble!". The balls followed suit.

This idea brings the image of a powerful sorcerer to the forefront of his character. He commands magic, and thy will is done. This approach won't work for everybody.. or more likely anyone but him, but the idea behind it can.

Too many times I have seen performers get eaten alive by a crowd because they did not take charge or have proper audience management. They have to know YOU are the one THEY listen to and if they get out of line, it could be curtains for them.. and not the nice kind either. I'm talking about some gaudy 60's print. You must be in command and that only comes from confidence in yourself and your material. Believe in yourself and others will follow. It's all about conviction...

Just ask anyone in prison.


Thursday, November 01, 2007

Do they know who you are?

For that fact do YOU know who you are?

I have stated before that some of the most popular people can be recognized by their silhouette. However, what makes them famous? There's a thread at Theory 11 about "reputation" right now and I felt compelled to chime in with this:

"My "street cred" tends to be known more for my personality and style of magic which I personally feel is better than being "that guy with the cards"

Name recognition. That's where it's at."

I stand by that whole-heartedly too. Anybody can do magic (almost), but not everyone can stand out. Instead of working on the next big thing with a plastic bag, why not focus on your own ideas... or personality.

To quote Rudy Coby, "They can't steal your personality. They will look like fools for trying." (Paraphrased as I dun have his notes in front of me) Besides, why use someone ELSE'S magic to make YOUR reputation. That's like a band doing other people's songs to get famous. (Sorry Me First and the Gimmie-Gimmies)

Don't get me wrong, there are classics and plots that you can make your own very easily in the eyes of normal people. Magicians judge too harshly, but if you want to have a reputation, it's best they recognize YOU, not your Guardians Deck. Anyone can buy a prop....

Only an artist can bring it to life.