Oh internet....

You get me.

It's amazing what you can find on Google image search sometimes...

Yelp and away!

For those of you who get them, do you read reviews or comments about your shows/performances? Do you get bad ones? Do you blow them off because the person is likely a mental midget as far as you are concerned?

While this is usually true of YouTube commentators, it might be a good idea to step back and maybe see if it's not them... it's you.

Listen to detractors... but only a little bit. Don't get angry and take it personal, especially if it's the lay public. They might just have a point and you are missing it. If you see the same complaint pointed out fix it don't just dismiss it.

Mind you if they can't spell basic words correctly you might just want to ignore it complete.

Kno wat I men?

Candle Magick

This must have just FLOORED people back then (magicians included)...


I often wonder what it would have been like to be alive in the era before these kinds of things were widely available. It would have been like not knowing magic at all.

Audio Addendum

A while back I posted my guide to running your own audio (seen Here). With the new types of interfaces the idevices adopted (the "lightning" charger) you might be wondering if my advice still applies. It does but be aware of this - Much like in magic, do no buy cheap knockoffs.

They make a lightning to 30 pin adapter but due to cheap unauthorized versions coming out of (just guess where. I bet you can get it in one) you need to be aware that a genuine apple made adapter, at this point, is the only one the ijet will work with.

Always ask for the real deal.

Known Unknowns...

Take a look around the magic community. The forums, social media, etc. Take a look at what some of the more "known" magi are known for. Now ask yourself this question: What do I want to be known for?

Do you want to be seen as an authority on a certain type of effect? Do you want to be perceived as the person who doesn't credit or fakes demos that nobody trusts? (I hope not) Do you want to have other seek you out for your knowledge about props or performing prowess?

Whatever you think you might want to leave behind, start cultivating that now. It will take you ten years to get proficient at something and/or be noticed for it.* If you have no desire to leave your mark on the magic world just disregard what I have said and go on about your business.

These are not the droids you are wanting people to remember you for.

*More or less. Your results may vary. Some settling may occur during shipping

You will be soft rocked....

Dear magicians,

Please stop using really sedate background music for your trailers. It makes an otherwise good magic product seem really dull. If your demo makes me sleepy it equates to the trick being boring. There is better low key music that doesn't sound like a relaxation tape from the 80s.

Sincerely,

The Mngmnt.

T.K.O.

Technically Knock-Offs don't just happen in the marketplace. Another magician can rip you off and there isn't much you can do about it other than flood the market so they will just blend into the background with everyone else.

If the product is so good that other performers want to steal it then once you sell it more thieves will appear. I myself have had one of my own things reproduced overseas and I will tell you that the quality is TERRIBLE. Thus let me get to the point...

If you buy knock-offs to save a few bucks because you are a cheap asshole then you deserve what you get.

To be fair it can be difficult to tell because other people will use your demo, images, and whatnot to sell the unauthorized copies. However, if you are on a site where English is obviously not their first language you might want to not buy from them. There are clues everywhere. If the item is sold for 20$ everywhere else and they have it for 3$... you might just be getting screwed.

Your best bet is to go right to the source and, if possible, buy directly from the creator if you can. If not head to a reputable dealer. It's really not that hard. However, if you are lazy or cheap then, once more, you deserve what you get. If the deal is too good to be true...

it most likely is.

That little red line...

In today's world almost EVERYTHING has built in spell check somewhere. It really makes me sad when I see spelling mistakes on a product that's being presented as professional quality. The fact that most trailers, books, videos, etc usually or should go by at least 2-3 sets of eyeballs before release and still fuck up huge fascinates me.

Why do I bring this up? The new trailer for Giovanni Liver'a effect Rope, Nut, Knot has a bit of an oops moment in it:
Even if English is not your first language someone should have said something before this got posted EVERYWHERE! Did Giovanni not see this before it went live?

Ok well I guess one little slip is fine. It happens. However...
 
HOW THE HELL DOES IT HAPPEN TWICE!? On his second product trailer for Salt and Silver the above screw up happens and I am pretty sure Eric Mead knows how to spell sophisticated so we can't blame him.

I am eagerly awaiting the third effect trailer to see if they just unleash the trifecta of "how the hell did that slip through"?

If you ever release any product make sure you get some people to preview it before it ever hits the eyes of the public. You don't need to look like an idiot and if you hire someone else to do it and they do this kinda stuff FIRE THEM...

Out of a cannon if need be.

Reminders...

Hey there my friendly neighborhood smappdoodles! I have not stopped posting just been busy lately. I have some posts brewing in my skull but for now I leave you with some required reading.

Just replace the word cartoonist with magician.

Bizzaro.'s Guide to Running Your Own Music

I have been sitting on this for a while mainly because I was waiting for the newest version of an app I was helping Beta Test come out. That's right. I was helping to make something better and I was doing it FOR YOU! (and myself as well)

Let me tell you how nice and liberating it is to be able to run your own music without having to deal with inept techies who can't seem to understand the complexities of "pause" and "un-pause".

There are a myriad of options for running music from your pocket. They range into the thousands of dollars area to the low hundreds. A very popular one is the Show Cues App. However if you are broke (or cheap) then 90$ for an app seems like quite a bit. 

If you think that's not pricey enough, you can go the Media Star route. (The most modern version of the much coveted MP3 tech) This one is pretty swank as it can control your lighting and whatnot as well. 

However, if you are like me and just need some fades, pauses, and other random sundry features let me tell you what I have got goin' on in my pants.

Remote Broadcast

If you JUST need to start and stop music your first stop is the iJet remote control. (well that and an ipod type device.) Now before we go any further, let me set a few things about the iJet straight. You will see or hear some people bitchin' about how it doesn't work right. The fault is actually on both sides. 

The iJet buttons don't work if you just quickly press them. This is by design so it can't accidentally go off in your pocket. You have to hold the button down for about half a second. The problem is that I have found this information nowhere in the documentation. You just kind of have to "discover" that for yourself. So it's a mix of operator error and manufacturer omission. Once you are armed with this information, it makes the whole set-up work fine.

One of the cool things about the iJet for me is the fact you can tether up to 7 remotes to one device. If you are a weird anal retentive artist type like me and want to activate your music while holding a prop and not have to go to your pocket this is a great thing.

Speaking of remotes in your pocket, let me tell you about an old tried and true trick. If you glue some tiny fake costume jewels to the play button (and any other button you plan to use a lot) you can easily activate it from the outside of your pockets.

Go Go Gadget Go Button app!

If you need something a little more stout than just the default ipod playlists then I highly recommend an app called Go Button. It's much cheaper than the aforementioned options and has recently been updated with a much better functionality than it's first iteration. It's also the program I have been helping to beta test. Many of the features it was missing in version 1 have been suggested and implemented making it a much more complete show cue interface. One of my favorite features is the ability to customize your remote button's functions.

It also let's you loop, fade, and edit songs. Like any show cue program you can layer music tracks and other various helpful commands. For self-run music it's quite handy especially now.

(For those of you who just want to have your own sound person running your music you can use this for that too or use free programs like This One to run your music and sound effects.)

In Contusion...

You have many options to help run your music yourself. If you need it, drop the hammer on the expensive ones. If you are like me and have 40-50$ laying around to commit to such a project you can't go terribly wrong with iJet and Go Button. There will always be naysayers to every solution. It's up to you to decide for yourself by being a smart consumer. Listen to your heart...

and me.

Abandon ship!

 

Something a friend of mine did...

Those that don't...

This goes out to all of you who are frustrated about being passed over, overlooked, or otherwise looked down on because you are trying to do something that is outside the "norm" in the entertainment business.

Most of the time the people who are in power are there because they spent their time and energy to get there. If they had any talent or propensity for being a good performer they would not be hiring other acts that THEY deem worthy.

It's like film/music/theater critics. usually they think they know all about a subject because they went to school for it, studied it, or tried it and could not succeed so now they are an "authority". Of course sometimes people who actually know their shit get put into place to wield said power, but they usually do not do so on their own volition.

So just remember, those people who snub you because you don't fit in their "box", it may not be you (it could be but that's another post entirely). Just be patient. Your day will come.

And one day those people will be dead.

You know what?

I couldn't have said it better myself...

Table for one?

You know what looks like crap? A guy with a tiny table on a HUGE stage. The table is already kinda small but performing it on a huge empty stage makes it look even smaller.

Just something I noticed.

I'm over the underground...

Dear magicians,

You really can't call yourself "underground" if you release product to the masses. You just sound like an idiot if you do. We don't have an underground anymore really. The moment you put something online for everyone to see that's it you're done. You want to be a hipster underground, then only show people stuff in person. That's it. Nuff' said.

Sincerely,
the mngmt.

Retro Fitting?

I have a friend who is trying to learn some magic to add to her collection of skills. She has some friends who are trying to teach her how to do a Biddle count. This kind of shit confounds me. Not that they are trying to teach a beginner an upper-intermediate  sleight. It's the fact that we, as magicians, are still trying to teach people shit from books written in the early 1900's. For fuck's sake Expert at the Card Table was written in 1902!!

We are telling people to learn from books that have the phrase "Borrow a gentleman's pocket handkerchief and bowler hat".

There have been great advancements on the techniques shown in those books. I'm not even talking about DVDs but OTHER BOOKS! I know magicians are behind the times usually but this is ridiculous.

When someone asks me for a book to start someone out with you know what I tell them? The Mark Wilson Course. (Not the small pocket version but the thick ass phone book looking thing) Sure it was written in the '70s but at least it's more current than Royal Road or Scarne.

I'm fine with people liking the books, getting material from them, etc but STOP trying to push your religion on others who are first starting out. Sure you should learn the basics but there are easier ways to acclimate them to that kind of stuff in today's world.

Hell the Klutz book of magic is a good book...

Reaction Time

Let me put something out there in the ether: Just because it gets reactions doesn't mean it's good.

I could strangle people in the street naked and get a reaction. Doesn't mean people like it. I am sick of hearing performers trying to validate an act, joke, or effect-for-sale with the "reaction" argument. Outside of magic, you can get a reaction from a simple false transfer with a coin. Doesn't mean I am gonna sell it on a DVD for 20$.

We fool ourselves into thinking reaction is the litmus test of how good or bad something is. Sometimes NO reaction is better because that means you fried them so hard they can't think or move. It's kinda like after sex when you... sorry forgot who I was talking to. It's like in D &D when you roll a natural 20.

A lot of comedians get nervous polite laughter and assume they wrote a good joke when in reality their line about sleeping with their sister came off less like a joke and more like a confession. The same thing happens in magic. People applaud by habit. Do enough shows you will know the good reactions from the bad.

So the next time you have an effect you wanna sell or defend because you got people on camera cussing or ma and pa six-pack are impressed at your local Wal-mart step back and write yourself a reality check.

Maybe it's not just you.

Airheads...

I'm pretty sure magicians are the only ones who think that levitating a balloon, bubble, or bird is magic.

Want proof? Ok. Overheard at a magic convention show while watching a performer do a levitating bubble trick:
Magician: "Isn't that cool?"
Magician's Wife: "Umm.. no shit. Bubbles float."

Draw your own conclusions.

Let the right ones in...

Let me tell you a little something about myself: I am very critical of my own performances. I am always looking for ways to improve my material. Even if it's something as simple as a cosmetic change on a prop or a look or gesture.

As I have mentioned in the past, the secret to being a better performer is to give a damn. If you care you'll work on something until you are content with it. An act or performance can never be done. There is always something to improve.

The question is how do you find those improvements? Simple. Go out and effin' perform!! The more you sail the boat, the more leaks you will find. The more arrows you fire the better your aim will be. The more cats you shave the umm... furrier your.. uh.. pants will get.... (They can't all be gold).

My point is every performance is a learning experience IF YOU LET IT. Some people just perform, collect their check, and go home. Every time you perform something is different. Something is better or worse. Something can be fixed. You have to pay attention to it tho' You must be like skynet and become self-aware! Don't be too lazy either. Be proactive! (I don't mean the acne medication either) If you can't get to it right away, make a note of it. Every cell phone has a way to make notes. Take advantage of that!

The more you perform, the more chances you have to fix things. The more you fix, the better your act will get. The better your act is the happier you (and everyone who watches you) will be. So the next time you see me perform just know that afterward backstage I will be taking stock of everything that just occurred...

and possibly crying.

Trailer hitch...

More and more I have been seeing magicians disgruntled at misleading trailers or effects making claims that, like a hooker with beer flavored nipples, might be too good to be true.

Some have taken a pro-active approach to call some companies and performers on their BS while others merely sit on forums and complain. A recent post about ANOTHER post elsewhere suggested magicians are cheap bastards (and they are) and if they figure out an effect from the trailer they won't buy it because the EFFECT is the important factor not the handling. Due to that fact trick trailers are having to be "faked" in spots to prevent said cheap-assedness from occurring.

My personal belief is that if your effect isn't good enough to hold up on camera without some tweaking then maybe you need to work on it some more or not put it out at all. Anyone who has been reading this journal the last ten years (Holy crap it's almost been ten years hasn't it?) knows that I will call attention to fake demos. I haven't had to do it as much because others have taken up the task as well and tend to get to it before I do which is great!

However, the fact it still happens just goes to say a lot about our profession. The biggest problem of course is magicians suffer from one inherent flaw... we're still only human. We like to get away with things when we think we can and when we're caught we don't apologize for inconveniencing anyone... it's because we are sorry for getting caught.

Mind you some people straight up refuse to admit to shinanigans when busted but ultimately the reputation damage has been done. Magicians People will bitch about anything given half the chance, but when you know that you can limit that percentage by just doing a little thinking....

and that might be where the fault lies.