Rant in WTF minor

And now I present one of the two rats you will probably never see, as this one was the fourth. It might get published next issue of SM but what do I know. They weren't paying for my opinions so everyone gets them for free.

Why am I stuck In Magician Hell? #4
Written by: Bizzaro. The Optical Illusionist
"A Mass Debate"

I once told another magician my philosophy on performing as a magician. "I don't care if they figure it out as long as they have a good time." To which he replied, "Why bother then?" After fighting off the urge to smack him it got me thinking... What exactly IS the point? Well that is today's expose'. (Kinda like when dateline goes after child molesters... except with more card tricks and no hope of anyone getting laid.)

Magic vs. Entertainment.. round one, FIGHT! Some performers go for a more low tech, high effect kind of magic. Sure you can look at it and see how it was or could be done, but you don't care because it's fun and entertaining. There is nothing wrong with this kind of magic... unless you ask the overly serious magi. They think trying to put the focus on entertainment and not magic (ie: fooling someone) is wrong. Like Rosanne Bar in a two piece wrong. In my opinion, those guys need to be beaten to death and then fed to the uptight bastahds at the Magic Castle.

They say not caring if someone figures it out as long as they are amused is a cheap cop out. I say they can take a flying leap. Most magic guys are just talking heads with no personality or fashion sense. You could swap most magicians heads onto other bodies and no one would notice. It's sad kids. Really.

Alright, so you say what's wrong with wanting to fool people and, as Paul Harris says, create astonishment. (Dirty hippie) You want to be revered as a god? Not content merely being one of the unwashed masses? Nay! You want all of the power and prestige that comes with being a guy with deck of cards and a soda can with a coin in it can afford. Explain this to me... what do you do if someone sees thru your smoke and mirrors? What then. What do you have to fall back on? That's right. NOTHING!! You know why? Cuz' you can't buy personality online you little weasels!! No one carries it. Can't be bootlegged or fabricated. Face it. Yer screwed!!

A lot of magicians think you HAVE to fool people. Problem is you can't fool everyone all of the time. Some can see right thru that little ruse of yours. Here is a way to protect yourself from such an occurrence. It's very easy. If they say "I saw how you did that" look them dead in the eye and with a smile on your face say, "Blow me." (Or an equivalent thereof) If you don't care, they won't care either. Some people love to bust magicians. They were probably home schooled. Those people have problems. Regardless, if your focus is more on amusement and not one of, "I'm goooona FOOL Yooooooo suuuckah!!", then they will like and remember YOU. I know it's a weird concept for someone to like you for who you are not what you can do. Try it. You'll find it works out well and your title as a magician will actually mean something finally. Let's face it, as a form of entertainment we rest somewhere below jugglers and right above some mimes.

I'm not saying don't practice. For gawd's sake PRACTICE. Practice yer little ass off. Make the magic you do as good as you can. Just remember, people are more interested in people than crappy card tricks. It's ok to be a human being and a magician. It's possible.... possibly not for you but...
Take a gander at the money makers in entertainment. They're making people laugh and think. They're not able to do a flawless tabled faro no... but who the hell cares!! A double backed card and a funny sticker makes for a better trick than ALL of the sleight of hand in the world. Trust me on this.

So Entertain or amaze; that is the question. Is it possible to do both? F*&K yah it is. First, don't be an ass-clown when you perform. If people think yer above them they will not be on yer side when you screw up. Enjoy what you're doing and others will too. Don't listen to anyone who sez' you HAVE to fool people ALL the time. (Especially If they sound like a car salesman when they perform) If they couldn't entertain a thought, let alone a crowd, do yourself and the rest of us a favor. Kill them....

In the face.

Bizzaro.